The Flaw of Comparing Yourself to Others

If you lack contentment, it could be because you’re comparing yourself to others.

You’ve been on Facebook and seen the pictures of others living their seemingly exciting lives.

It only takes a moment to find yourself wishing you had someone else’s career, body, house, or vacation.


Comparing ourselves to others is an everyday activity!

But there’s a critical flaw in this mental exercise.

You don’t have all the information.

Someone might have a great body, but they might be seriously ill.

That great vacation might have been paid for with an inheritance after a family member passed away.

You never know by looking at someone in passing.


A smarter strategy is to compare yourself to your recent past.

How is your figure compared to 6 months ago?

How are your finances compared to last year?

If you’re making progress, congratulate yourself.

Most people aren’t doing nearly as well.

They’ve weighed the same 210 lbs and had the same $1,200 in their bank account for the last 20 years.


If your life isn’t moving forward, then take pause and address the situation.


Theodore Roosevelt once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.”

Think about that statement and decide if it rings true for you.


Try these tips to free yourself from unnecessary comparisons:


Catch yourself early in the process. As soon as you realize that you’re making comparisons to others, shift your focus to something else.

 You can control your thoughts, so use that ability to your advantage.

Remember that the journey is what matters.

Everyone is on a journey to learn, create, and become something unique.

It’s an individual experience that isn’t impacted by what others are doing or accomplishing.

Comparing yourself to others is a game that can’t be won.

There are a lot of people in the world. Through sheer statistics, there will always be someone with a more attractive spouse, more money, a better car, or just a more exciting life in general.

There’s no way to compete with 8 billion people in every facet of life.

Look to your strengths. Comparisons tend to focus on our weaknesses.

We usually compare our shortcomings against others.

Embrace your strengths and be proud.

Now use those strengths to your advantage.

List the things you have. Comparisons highlight the things we lack.

It’s much more productive to think about the things you do, your mood and frame of mind will be more positive, and you’ll be in a better position to compete and succeed.

People only let you see the things they want you to see.

Sure, they’ll let you see their new BMW and the vacation pictures from Maui.

But you’ll never see the tears and fights in the bedroom, or the verbal abuse they take from their mother-in-law.

Keep in mind that social media is used for showing the good, rather than telling the bad.

It’s just a habit. Our lives are overflowing with them, and some are straight-up harmful.

Some can be like driving with the emergency brake on; it can wear us down quickly.

Labelling the tendency to compare as a habit has a powerful advantage because we know that habits can be broken.


Comparing yourself to others is limiting and self-defeating.

No one can be expected to compare favourably to the vast number of people in the world.

Make an effort to limit your comparisons; if you have the desire to compare, just take account of where you are today in comparison to where you were this time last year.

Are you making progress or backsliding?

If you continue to enhance the areas that are important to you, your life is likely to become more fulfilling and exciting!

With Love, Coach Stacey

Read: 20 Ways to Enhance Your Happiness for more great tips!   

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